Dear Tyra, I am writing...to ask for just two things...

Dear Tyra Banks,

So it's the day after Christmas and although I've received a lot of fantastical gifts this year, I unfortunately didn't get the one thing I BEGGED Santa for. Now, I'm not sure if you celebrate the holiday or not, but I have something to ask of you.

Here's the thing, I tend to walk in my sleep. I know. It's weird. Not only do I walk in my sleep, but I tend to do things while still in slumber. I once woke up in the living room at 6 in the morning playing Rockband. Luckily I didn't hurt myself, and amazingly I was able to play all 3 instruments and sing at the same time. There was also the night I figured out a rubix cube in my sleep. I set up a video camera to tape myself the same night, but sadly the tape was damaged after my niece used it as a pool floaty.

Anyway, the other night I had another one of my "episodes". I started walking while sleeping, then I guess I proceeded to the bathroom and..well...I shaved off my eyebrows. I don't know what came over me! I was having a terrible nightmare of furry slugs crawling across my forehead and a man in a pink, glittery robe told me that the only way I could stop them was to shave them with a Bic razor, so maybe that's what it was. Who knows.

I saw an episode of your show a couple of years back and I thought it was great that you gave a woman eyebrows so that she could feel beautiful again (although I did think she was good looking before)...But everybody knows you have to have good eyebrows. They totally frame the face! Duh. You're such a giver. I don't know how you do it.



Like I said, I asked Jolly 'Ol Saint Nick for a pair of arches, but he just sent me some generic note about how I should be dreaming of fairies and sugar plums. He also included an autographed copy of his headshot, so I guess that was nice.

Let me know when you get this letter and I'll send you my address. I don't want to include it in this note because I'm just not sure if you're actually reading your "fan letters"...I would hate for one of your assistants to think I was kidding. Plus, I'd be really embarrassed if Miss J or Nigel read it. I really look up to them.

Thanks for your time and I hope you're having a great holiday season.

Your eye-hair-less friend,
Kimee